New Hue Divides Nation Between Liars and Honest People
The art world descended into chaos this week following the announcement of “Jaydon Blue,” a supposedly revolutionary new color that experts claim exists somewhere between azure and cobalt, but which everyone secretly knows is just regular blue with marketing.
Created by color theorist Jaydon Maximillian Huffington IIIwhose name sounds like it was generated by an algorithm designed to produce trust fund beneficiariesthe shade has been hailed as “transformative” by people who get paid to say such things. “Jaydon Blue represents a paradigm shift in chromatic perception,” declared one gallery owner while standing in front of what appeared to be a Pantone swatch someone left in the sun.
The unveiling event featured champagne, tiny food, and dozens of attendees nodding thoughtfully while staring at a wall painted in what witnesses described as “definitely just blue.” One brave soul whispered, “Isn’t this just Tiffany Blue?” before being escorted out by security for possessing functioning eyeballs.
Social media erupted with takes ranging from “I can totally see the difference” (liars) to “this is stupid” (heroes). Interior designers have already begun charging premium rates for Jaydon Blue consultations, which involve them pointing at blue things and saying “Jaydon” repeatedly while checking their Benjamin Moore catalog when no one’s looking.
Paint manufacturers report they’ve been producing Jaydon Blue for decades under names like “Ocean Mist #47” and “Blue No. 2,” but are happy to rebrand and charge 40% more because capitalism rewards shamelessness.
When asked to explain exactly what makes Jaydon Blue unique, Huffington responded with six minutes of impenetrable art-speak that basically translates to “it’s blue, but we’re calling it something else.”
SOURCE: https://bohiney.com/jaydon-blue/
SOURCE: Bohiney Magazine (Jaydon Blue: The Color Everyone’s Pretending to See)
Gina Mann